


"Shepherds"

by Scmnz



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2020-05-16 04:50:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19310974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scmnz/pseuds/Scmnz
Summary: Hastur, Crowley, and Ligur are undercover as shepherds, when they encounter a certain Archangel with "Good news"





	"Shepherds"

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this post on tumblr

The night was dark. The moon was new and clouds covered the stars. In a large grassy field stood three shepherds, watching their flock. “This is complete bullshit.” One of them muttered.

 

“Sheep shit.” The red-haired shepherd corrected.

 

“What?”

 

The “shepherd” Crowley gestured at all sheep milling around the dark field. “Sheep shit.”

 

“You think that’s funny?” The third shepherd scowled.

 

They had been given this assignment five years ago. Five bloody years watching sheep. and for what?! A rumor that heaven was up to something big and their plan would somehow involve sheep near Bethlehem? Five years of baaing sheep, lost sheep, and indeed, sheep shit. And five years of Crowley and his _humor_. It was fine for him, he liked the surface.

 

One of the sheep wandered over and began chewing on Hastur’s wig. He didn’t try and stop it.

 

“Why are we out here in the middle of the night anyway? Seems an awfully odd time to feed the sheep.” Crowley drawled.

 

Ligur shrugged. “Orders are orders.” They’d already had this conversation, multiple times over the years. Sometimes he thought Crowley just talked to hear the sound of his own voice.

 

And so they waited, hours crawling by as the sheep ambled about.

 

Suddenly the sky becomes blindingly bright, like an explosion of light. But it’s beyond mere light, it’s a painful burning terror for the demonic shepherds. They cower, longing to flee, the light blankets the surrounding landscape. There is no escape.

 

Squinting up they see the silhouette of an angel in the sky. “Do not be afraid!” He booms. “For I am the Archangel Gabriel!” Oh for fuck's sake, not _him_.

 

Noticing the shepherds continuing to cower and look away from him, Gabriel tries again. “It’s all right, human shepherds! You are safe. I come with tidings of great joy!” He waited, clearly expecting a response.

 

Crowley was the first to force himself to stand tall, though he still trembled at the sheer force of that light. “Tidings of great joy is it? That’s nice.” He called out.

 

“Isn’t it?!” Gabriel’s smile grew. “Today a baby has been born in Bethlehem. Rejoice!”

 

 Again, he seemed to expect some kind of response. But, a baby? Those were born every day. Still, best not to disappoint an angel and reveal themselves. Hastur forced a smile and bowed. “Great news indeed.”

 

“He will be your savior! Go find him. You will know him because he will be sleeping in a manger.”

 

More angels appeared around Gabriel. And oh no. Oh no, they were holding harps. The celestial choir began singing songs of praise. And even if the holy power had not been enough to bring the demons to their knees in agony, somehow worse was Gabriel’s voice, singing far louder than the other angels and completely off key.

 

And then, as abruptly as they had come, the angels vanished.

 

“I suppose” Ligur finally managed when the pain had faded. “We had better go look at this baby.”


End file.
